Learn with Independence, Live with Independence and Lead with Independence

India is the land of heritage. On the occasion of Independence day we suddenly start remembering all the patriotic Hindi movies, patriotic songs etc. Suddenly the whole nation color changes to tricolor. Everyone gives messages of patriotism, independence, love, affection, care and above aquote-why-independence-if-the-slaves-of-today-will-be-the-tyrants-of-tomorrow-jose-rizal-81-4-0455ll every one becomes like a jawan of this country. We dress our kids in tricolor, teach them patriotic songs, make them practice to sing ‘National anthem’.

Do you know why? Because on this day we tend to remember that we are citizens of India and all Indians are brothers and sisters. Otherwise this whole country has all different colors but not the tricolor which unites us on 15th August and 26th January.

Today’s generation have labeled these days as ‘ Online Sale’ ‘ Dry Day’ ‘ Long weekend’, if it falls on Sunday ” Ek chhutti Chali gayi Yaar” .  Have we not changed the real meaning of these days? Until we will not respect the independence, we cannot enjoy that.

Celebrating Independence Day is due to history which we have not seen and that is the reason we tend to forget the pains and have changed the real meaning of this day. So let us join together with heart and spirit for the pains which we are suffering day and night like child abuse, rape, child trafficking, restraining women to indulge them in and as sex workers. There are societal atrocities which are rising day by day and the basic reason of this is our thoughts which are contaminated. We are living in Hippocratic era. We know what is right and what is wrong but we do not want to involve ourselves because ‘ it’s not my matter’.

Independence is a seed for your thought.  This is the seed of S- Self Respect, E- Empathy, E-Empowerment and D- Decision making. Plant this seed in your heart and nourish it with your self-evaluation. Talk to yourself. independence-day-image

Just answer one question to yourself whenever you do anything “Are we doing what is right? Is it justifiable to my soul?” The moment you get the answer you will be in the right direction.

Happy Independence Day!

 

Talk to yourself

I wonder how a word Mentor gives immense belief and relaxation to a person during stressful situation. We tend to incline to a person for emotional balance, career growth, personal and professional growth and sometimes it is without any cause. The relation built between two people to satisfy the urge of being mentally relaxed has led to the relationship of Mentor and Mentee.

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It leads to a question. Is it our inability of handling our own situation that we need mentors in our life? Or is it that we start considering a person a mentor when he/ she is the only one to hear our problems. Are we not trying to find a shoulder in our bad times, who can give support and can listen to us without judging.? Does it happen with you? During discussion with many of my friends I have come across a general statement ” Thank God you are there to listen, you are like a mentor to me”. Are we not diluting the real meaning of the word  “Mentor” and making it more resembling to a “Good Listener”.

The reason for this paradigm shift of a ‘Being Mentor’ to a ‘ Good listener’ is that we have stopped enjoying our own company. We have stopped celebrating ‘Aloneness’. Aloneness can help you to find yourself which walking or following a crowd can never happen..0aa9359a28dfee76d3b4718ac32f1b0e--motivational-thoughts-inspirational-thoughts

A Mentor is like an anchor of your Life. Give it a deep thought and figure out who is the real anchor of your life. Lastly I would like to quote Swami Vivekananda’s thoughts ” Talk to yourself once in a day…otherwise you may miss meeting an excellent person in this world”

Be a Mentor to yourself and start enjoying your company.. start listening your thoughts and be true to your feelings. Gradually you will figure out the real anchor of your life and will understand all good listeners are not mentors. Embrace your qualities of Mentor- A mentor is embedded with six qualities and they are

M- Mother Leadership

E- Empathy

N- Nurturing

T- Trustworthy

O- Optimistic

R- Realistic

You may not get mentor everytime but there is one unique person who always wants to talk to you, that’s your ‘SELF’… Be YOU.

 

 

When Thousands Lamps Shine, It is Diwali Time

I am always inspired by your thoughts… ur thoughts keeps me going..

profsubhashsharma

When Thousands Lamps Shine

Subhash Sharma (28.10.2016)

When thousands lamps shine,

All at  a time,

Nature sings a rhyme,

It is Diwali time,

When thousands stars shine,

All at a time,

Nature sings a rhyme,

It is Diwali time

When thousands flowers bloom,

All at a time,

Nature sings a rhyme,

It is Diwali time.

It is Happy time.

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Know yourself- Steps to “Be”

Today just thought of expressing my inner feelings ..Sometimes I feel that why is it so tough to be natural. I have heard so many times from spiritual gurus.. “Don’t try to become…just be”….. It is so easy to say…but whenever I think of implementing it I find it so tough…

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Its so tough to be what you are..so how to achieve it. Below are the thoughts of mine which I try to implement for understanding of self. It is helping me to figure out my emotions and hope it helps others too.

  1. Evaluation:- Please stop evaluating yourself again and again. There is no point in evaluating our-self repeatedly because we are trying to hear what we want to hear as a feedback
  2. Acceptance:- Acceptance is an art, it takes loads of efforts by people to accept the reality, but its very easy if just hear the first voice which comes from within as it is the purest feeling,just like a dew drop which remains free from the contamination of our own thoughts. So, the moment you hear the voice, understand it and go for the thought
  3. Channelize:- “Remain pure all your life; guard your own honor and never transgress the honor of others. Be very tranquil, but when necessary, harden your heart.”
  4. Be a mentor to yourself.

At last I would like to say to find out #Weber’s fraction of your stimuli, it will help you to evaluate what fraction of changes can change your originality and is changing you from ‘be to become’

Congratulate yourself once you start feeling that you have started achieving it…

Reach out to me on

https://www.linkedin.com/in/gauri-a-khan-phd-

https://www.facebook.com/gauri.a.khan

Relationship- Why is it required

I have recently read a post on Facebook ‘ Many people redeem relationship because they can be used as and when required’. You may laugh on it but actually this has become the irony and it is taking the shape of reality.

What is relationship? It is the way in which two people are connected, i.e. either by blood, or by behavior or thoughts. The relationship between two beings is humanity which in today’s business world is known as Interpersonal Relationship.

It has given such an importance that people are using it as a new technique of being opportunist. Being opportunist is not bad, but making relations just on the basis of getting opportunities clearly states the materialistic reason for making relations and then encashment of the relations. People become materialistic when “You start loving things and using people for your benefit; instead of using things and loving people”.

inspirational-buddha-quotes-and-famous-zen-sayings-images-page-1-relationship-zen-quotesIt is often taught faithfulness is the best relationship one can have. But…is it happening? Do we actually rely ourselves? We suspects ourselves, how can we rely others ? This feeling of non belief, distrust and unfaithfulness has lead to  the thought of ‘why do we need relationship’  We are not satisfied in anything and the reason is we do not believe anyone not even ourselves. We try to find a support everywhere, in the form of friend, a mentor a guide, but do we really have faith on them. Is the samarpan there….

You must be thinking how easy it is to write samarpan.. but so tough to practice. Its easy to preach than to to practice. I will share your load. Here are some steps which can be done for self realization. It is important for self realization before entering into any relationship.

  • What makes you feel comfortable?
  • What makes you feel jealous?
  • What makes you feel happy?
  • What makes you sad?

 

What do employees want most?

In this competitive era the volatile environment has brought widespread economic growth and social changes. Employees have become more vigilant toward’s the kind of experience they are gaining from the work they pursue. They are preferring experience over career. This is a big reason to understand what do employees really want.

Reducing Attrition percentage is a very big challenge in-front of companies. Companies are taking a lot of measures to keep their employees motivated. Lucrative salaries, Onsite visits, Fringe benefits and perks are some of the areas where companies are working upon since decades. A survey was conducted in 2016 which said that in the services space, 19.3 per cent was the overall attrition. Despite so many efforts the attrition prevails, why… Is it only salary, rewards and recognition, progress and opportunities or something else too which an employee want.

Questions which needs to be answered by HR of the company

1.What do employees want?

2.Why Employee Engagement is necessary?

a.When is it required?

b. How it should be executed?

The most important thing which an employee wants is TRUST- They want to trust you …and to be trusted!

Trust is a function of two things: Character – which includes integrity, motive, and intent and Competence – which includes capabilities, skills, results, and track record

Words, action and courtesy matters…. Trust can be achieved only when Leadership team or the top management, imbibes the characteristic of ‘Mother Leadership’…The way mother trusts her child and is always supportive, the leader should trust the employee.

Stress Friction: change the momentum of life

Stress is a term that is commonly used today but has become increasingly difficult to define. With organisms as complex as humans, stress can take on entirely concrete or abstract meanings with highly subjective qualities, satisfying definitions of both cause and effect in ways that can be both tangible and intangible.

Corporate are running stress reducing exercises, campaign and workshops, through organizing team outings, movies, lunch, dinners, cricket matches, fashion shows, festival celebrations, various competitions etc. But are they able to nullify the effects of stress due to work, time lines, bossism, dogma’s of the corporate etc. No, and it can be clearly seen through the rise in the attrition rate, hip- hopping of employees from one organization to other and large number of people inclining towards these spiritual organizations. These days, these spiritual organizations are playing a vital role in the corporate, by conducting various courses of meditation and stress burst-outs.

Stress is the inseparable part of the organization. It will remain, but the challenge is to channelize the stress energy into positive energy. Eliminating stress means, getting rid of responsibilities. Stress is like a friction force. Friction is must to change the momentum of the body as and when required by the conditions, therefore stress energy is must but it need to be channelized in the positive direction.

There are some tips to do it:

1- Be calm- let the dirt settle first in water and then clear water will be available

2- Analyze your thoughts

3- Don’t try to become something..be what you are…be natural

4- Reward yourself- Always try to acknowledge for every accomplishment be it small or big what you did

These are the natural things to be done when in stress. Just imagine a kid in you. Imagine the way kids express their emotions. It is so easy for them to express, but why is it tough for us.

Mala Kapadia (2004) contrasts between optimum utilization of resources in the business and the under utilization of our own potential. In her book “Emotional Intelligence- Workbook for beginners” she states that when we are free of anger, frustration, habitual patterns of reacting and defending self-perception, intuitive answers begin to arise and one is able to organize the mind’s energy.

Stress is like a friction force. Try to enjoy your ‘ Me time’. Do something which you wanted to do for long. Its not always important to take tough decisions when you are stressed. You can enjoy your own moods and rejuvenate yourself. You may get time to find the real self…

 

Corporate world- A world of fulfilling desires or a mirage!

Corporate world is a world of fulfilling desires, making relationships, networking and rationality. But as it is rightly said “All that Glitter is not Gold” (William Shakespeare). Stress is prevailing and sustainably developing in corporate world. People are running towards stress management institute but is it working? Is it giving them relief? No it is not giving relief. Their stress is cured partially but not fully.

When employees are disturbed internally it effects environment too. Employees have become emotional labor now. The moment they enter into the workplace they wear a mask as required by their job. They behave in a different way just because their job demands so.  Person- Work conflict in mechanistic organizations occur when people can fit into the systems where as Person- Work conflict in spiritual organizations occurs when systems can not be fit into the person. In either case if Person- Work conflict is too great then the person has to leave the organization and seek a mechanistic organization in which one can do the work or seek a spiritual organization in which one can express one’s core values. The expression of one’s core values within work is the way in which one sees ‘meaning’ and ‘purpose’ in work. When one experiences an alignment of the organization with one’s core values, one’s calling and one’s work and one finds joy and peace. Deming (2000) poisted that all anyone really wants is to have joy in work.

“Conflict is a war which evokes anxiety”. Anxiety leads to irresistible feelings which need to be simplified! It is a form of competition between perceived or actual incompatible needs, goals, desires, ideas, or resources (collectively called interests, the “desired state”)

A struggle for power causes conflict.(Erik A. Fisher, Steven W. Sharp ,The art of managing everyday conflict: understanding emotions and power … ,p2)

Conflicts result from differences in interests and values. One party perceives that another party has negatively affected or is about to negatively affect something the first party cares about.

Conflict exists whenever incompatible activities occur (Deutsch, 1973). Conflicts occur at all levels of interaction – at work, among friends, within families and between relationship partners. When conflict occurs, the relationship may be weakened or strengthened. Thus, conflict is a critical event in the course of a relationship. Conflict can cause resentment, hostility and perhaps the ending of the relationship. If it is handled well, however, conflict can be productive – leading to deeper understanding, mutual respect and closeness. Whether a relationship is healthy or unhealthy depends not so much on the number of conflicts between participants, but on how the conflicts are resolved. (Donna Bellafiore; Interpersonal Conflict and Effective Communication; 1998)

There are many common ways to handle conflict like power based, rights or entitlement based, interest based, relation based approaches and the most common integrative approach i.e. Win Win situation etc. These are the operational dimensions of handling conflict at workplace.

For conflict resolution operational dimension is used but for conflict dissolution spiritual dimension is required, which implies

IQ+ EQ= SQ

(IQ= Intelligence Quotient

EQ= Emotional Quotient

SQ= Spiritual Quotient)

i.e. Capability of doing work+ Will of doing work = Purpose of work

and if IQ+EQ= SQ i.e. there is a mismatch of capability and will of doing work then purpose of the work will not be a beneficiary for the organization. Henceforth conflict arises at workplace

First blog pos

I have created this blog, to share my ideas and my vision for a new way of thinking and its discussion for consciousness learning. It will be a great platform to discuss about the issues and a spiritual perspective to understand and resolve the problems.